Pretty Woman
by xerahs13
Summary: A parody of the 1990 classic Pretty Woman. A male prostitute, Alfred F. Jones, finds his way to the luxurious life of the visiting gentleman from London, Arthur Kirkland. If you've seen the movie, you pretty much get it. /UsUk/ Warning! It is mature with yaoi-time. Enjoy
1. You Must Have Been A Beautiful Baby

Chapter 1

In this world, there are only two classes; the lower and upper. The middle class has the same future, they work day in and day out. Everything's the same. Never do the two real classes meet, but in this world, by chance, they do in the city of dreams. What's your dream?

* * *

Francis Bonnefoy, a tall and handsome blonde Frenchman, carried himself well around the party for his client. He was a well-rounded and known corporate attorney for a very powerful businessman. He towered over the guest, his back erect and sturdy as he shook their hands and wooed the women. Slowly he made his way to find his client but he was nowhere to be found. He went by to his assistant Honda Kiku asked him. "Where is Mr. Kirkland? It's his party you know."

"I'm sorry, but he said he was taking his leave." The shorter male went back to writing on his clipboard walking away nonchalantly.

Francis heaved out a sigh and looked up the stairs. "Arthur!" he looked up exclaiming up at the slimmed frame blonde-haired man who walked gracefully down the stairs. He fixed his black necktie and walked to the bottom of the stairs, his sea-green eyes stared at Francis' blue ones. "I thought you left!"

"Francis, I am leaving." His London Accent rang softly from his mouth as he grabbed his coat and proceeded to walk outside of the beach home towards the parking lot as Francis followed him. "May I have the keys to your car?"

He raised an eyebrow and reached into his jacket pocket reaching his keys. "Why? You shouldn't be leaving, this is _your_ party Arthur." He took out the key to his cherry-red Ferrari and Arthur immediately snatched them from his hands and gave him a charming smile and walked to the car. "Listen…it's a very valuable car…do you know how to drive shift?"

"No, I do not." He smiled as he opened the car door sitting down, closing the door behind him.

"Listen, be very gentle with it, no? I had to save quite a bit of my checks for it."  
"Yes, checks I hand to you. Now, I'll see you at the meeting tomorrow." He put the car into drive and peeled out of the driveway as the car groaned and moaned as it wasn't being handled correctly.

Francis gave out a sigh and yelled at the heavens in his native language and flipped his hair from his face as he walked back to the party.

* * *

Inside the noisy city, Hollywood Boulevard had its ups and downs. Drug dealers and the users own the stars between Marilyn Monroe to Ricardo Montalbán. Even when the sun was setting, some others would wake up. Alfred Jones was one of these people.

His alarm rang loud on his bedside 'table' that resembled a box. He slammed the clock off, breaking it. He tossed his naked body over on the bed and sat up. He stretched out his muscular arms yawning and then getting his glasses to put them on. He rubbed his stomach and walked over to some clothes that may or not have been washed. He slowly put his clothes on and looked over on the other bed and noticed his roommate wasn't there. "Strange…Yao is always here." He sighed, thinking as he was probably scouting or already high. He walked over to the cracked mirror and fixed his honey-blonde hair and putting on his small cap and his coat covering his holy clothes. He laced up his boots and proceeded to walk out in search of his roommate.

It wasn't until an hour later he had found Yao with a group supervised by the notorious pimp Antonio Carriedo and by his side as always the _lovely_ Italian Lovino Vargas. "Yao!" He faced his roommate who seem already strung out on drugs and grabbed his arm. "What the hell are you doing here?"

"Oh!" Yao gave out a sheepish smile. "You're awake Alfred~…Aru~"

Alfred furrowed his brows looking down at Yao. "Yao…What are you doing here? Where did you get the money for your score?" he asked genuinely concerned over his friend and worried about how they will pay this next rent. "Yao…let's get out of here now."

Yao glared at Alfred. "Aiyaa! Alright, let go…" he jerked his arm out of Alfred's firm grip. He started to giggle as we walked down the stairs from the upper part of the club. Alfred silently followed.

Once the duo were outside Alfred had broken his silence. "Yao, what the hell did you do with our money? You know I was saving it up for the rent! How much did you take?"

"All this yelling…Relax I can pay you back!"

"Rent is due tomorrow Yao! I can't believe this!..." Alfred had let out a heavy sigh looking at his friend. "I guess we have to work hard this time around."

Yao had touched his brown hair that was in a ponytail which was draped over his shoulder and scanned the block seeing a familiar face. "Aru! Feliciano, do you know what block this is…this is our block! Why don't you run back to Ludwig and have him shell out your partners?"

The innocent Italian coward, letting out a small 'vee' as he moved from the tree where he was only resting from a long walk.

Alfred looked over to Yao. "You really have those mood swings when you're doped out aren't you?"

He sighed. "Aiyaa, I'm sorry…I just feel terrible that I took your money. I really wanted a pick-me-up…"

Alfred sighed as he looked out at the street seeing a cherry-red Ferrari jerking its way onto Hollywood Boulevard and making a stop near the two. "Holy crap! Is that a 2010 SA Aperta Ferrari?! Only 80 were built! What's it doing here?"

Yao looked over to the ordinary car. "Hm? It looks pretty fancy. Hey! You should go for that car! You get that money back!"

"Really? I'm still a beginner…"

"You can get this, aru!"

Alfred sighed, taking off his read coat, sporting a torn shirt that showed his belly-button and his slight 'V' that peaked from his low-rise skinny jeans and he sexually made his way to the car. He stopped at the passenger side leaning into the convertible. "Hey there, looking for a good time?"

Arthur looked at Alfred for the first time.


	2. Walkin' My Baby Back Home

Chapter 2

Arthur's sea-green eyes looked directly into the sky which was Alfred's eyes. Arthur slightly perspired to the sight and looked away and at the gas level. "Pardon, but do you know which way to Beverly Hills?"

Alfred smirked leaning back from the car and opening the passenger door of the cherry-red Ferrari. "For ten bucks I can show you personally," he said as he entered the car to the fancy black leather interior. "Hoshit this is nice!"

Arthur watched his new passenger enter the car, staring. "You're sitting on my coat."

Alfred looked at Arthur still smiling, lifting up his ass to get the coat from under him. "Oops~ Sorry. And by the way, where's the money~?"

Arthur reached into his back pocket for his leather tri-fold wallet and pulled out a twenty dollar bill. "I don't suppose you have change for a twenty?" He held out the bill and Alfred snatched it.

"I'll take it by a bank~ Now, let's get this baby going!"

Arthur stared at him for what seemed like five minutes, but it didn't last five seconds. He looked ahead of himself, his palms sweating and his heart racing. "Bloody hell, what am I doing here? I'm either going to get raped or killed…" he thought to himself slowly put the car back into drive and it groaned as he hit the gears at the wrong time.

"Jesus, don't you know how to drive? Hey! Put on your lights! Lights would be good at night you know!" Alfred yelled turning and looking at Arthur's smooth face and staring at his thick eyebrows.

"R-Right!" He felt around the car to turn on the lights, still unsure where his future will lead to. He wasn't a man of many risks outside from his work, this wasn't in his agenda. He felt Alfred staring, and he looked at him with the corner of his eye. "Um…so what's your name?"

Alfred looked ahead searching for the next road to take and he turned to look at Arthur. He smirked, "Whatever you want it to be baby~."

Arthur's face flushed a slight rose pink, yet he stared at Alfred giving him a look. Alfred laughed and looked ahead of the car. "It's Alfred F. Jones. Anyway, make a right at the next light."

Arthur did what he was told and looked over to Alfred one more time. "So…what are you? What's your profession?"

"I'm a prostitute." He smiled over to Arthur, his teeth aligned and perfect and his smile was almost sketched on. Arthur blushed again and grew silent.

The car ride stayed silent as neither of the two men talked. Being from different backgrounds, what could they possibly have in common? Alfred grew anxious at the silence as he felt his rent money float away, but Arthur was the one that broke the silence. "So…what's the estimate? How much do you get?" Arthur had thought carefully, being sure that he wouldn't offend the man next to him.

He grinned, not afraid to hide it considering Arthur was busy driving and might not notice. "'Can't take less than a hundred an hour."

Arthur's eyes widened and looked at him quickly, then back at the road. "A hundred dollars an hour and you have a safety pin holding your trousers closed?" He nearly choked and unaware why he asked the male prostitute his wager. "You have to be kidding."

"I don't joke about money."

He slightly chuckled. "Neither do I…a hundred dollars an hour…I suppose that pretty stiff…?"

Alfred smirked, reaching over the center console grabbing Arthur's crotch area firmly. "Mmm, not yet…but it has potential."

Arthur's eyes grew wide, weaving in and out of the road nearly hitting another car his face red and his palms were sweaty which made it harder to gain a grip of the steering wheel. Alfred laughed at his reaction and pointed out the next turn.

After another long ten minutes of silence, the car reached its stopping point as the door man quickly went to the aid of the passenger side of the car and opened it. Alfred stepped out and admired the architecture of the building before him. Arthur came next to him fixing his tie once more still nervous of what others would say, but thinking that male prostitutes wouldn't be as bad as a female one. "So…will you be alright on your way back?"

Alfred snapped out of his trance and looked down at the man he nearly towered over. "Oh, yeah." He was slightly disappointed about not going inside but thought he still had the rest of the night to work for his money. "I'll just catch a cab." Alfred did a slight popping noise from his mouth and began to walk away in a solemn manner. Arthur had scratched the back of his light blonde hair thinking over what he was about to say. He himself was attracted to Alfred and not had been with anyone for over six months and thought that in the United States he can at least have some fun. Arthur walked over to Alfred who was sitting on the bench waiting for a bus.

"Do you accompany men?" His face blushed again as he lowered his head from the embarrassment he might had to face.

Alfred grinned and stood up walking towards Arthur. "What's your name?"

Arthur slightly raised his head. "Arthur Kirkland."

"Well Arthur, I would gladly accompany you to your room." Alfred gave a slight slide smile as he followed the business man into the hotel room.


	3. Be Honest With Me

Hello everyone! Sorry for the long update, but I had some stuff I needed to do. Normally just hanging out on Facebook. Nonetheless, I'm back. I'd also like to stress to read my description. When I say 'If you've seen the movie, you pretty much get it' I mean that this is pretty much the movie. I'm sorry if I disappointed you, but if you don't like it, don't read it. So, enjoy or not, I just wanted to let you all know again. Thank you. :)

Xerahs13

* * *

Chapter 3

They have entered the hotel room. For Alfred, it was like the Buckingham Palace with the bronze nick-knacks and huge couch and the beautiful chandelier just above it. Alfred was in awe. He loved every place of it including the bar to the side of him. He was completely excited and ran to the couch flopping on top of it and grinning as Arthur slowly came into the room and locked it.

Arthur was trembling. He had brought some random man into his space and expected sex none the less. His self-conscious acted on him repeating what the norm was. This was far from it. He took a sigh and took off his coat putting it in the small coat closet, but he jolted when Alfred shrieked. "No fucking way! There's a pool here?! What kind of hotel room has its own small pool?!"

Arthur turned to looked at the pool. "It's actually shared by everyone who pays extra. You can go out there if you want."

"Really?! Let's go!"

He shook his head walking to the desk nearby, slowly undoing his tie. "I don't swim."

"What do you mean you don't swim? You paid extra for the pool and you don't want to swim?"

"It's more like I can't swim." He looked over at Alfred who sat crisscrossed on the over-sized couch that looked at him in disbelief. "W-What?"

"You seriously don't know how to swim?! Come on man! Everyone knows how!"

"Get off your bloody high horse, I do not." Arthur leaned back into the nicely crafted chair and looked away from Alfred, closing his eyes and began to wonder everything and asses the reason why he had brought a hooker into his room. He couldn't get the faces out of the other suits and ties watching Alfred. Arthur only had to bring up that he was only in America for a short time. He remembered the small elevator boy with thick eyebrows grinning up at Arthur just a while ago. Peter was his name; Alfred found that out asking him questions as if he could. He let out a sigh and opened his eyes staring back into beautiful blue ones; he smiled for a second but then jumped pushing his chair back away from Alfred who was sitting on his desk. "What the hell!"

Alfred grinned and containing his laughter at Arthur's face. "So, I'm under this time regimen and I have to head back to the 'office' you know." He reached into the back of his pants pocket (the only pocket he had from the wear and tear the trousers had been through) and pulled out an array of colours of condoms. "Are we going to do this or what?"

Arthur regained his skin colour back to its normal paleness. "Time! Everything has a bloody deadline. How much for the night?"

Alfred had to blink a couple of times and quickly added up his rent money. "Three hundred for the night." He said it with confidence and grinned. "I hope you can afford it, baby~."

Arthur took out his wallet and handed him straight billed three hundred American dollars from his wallet. "There you go, now shut up about time." He went back to leaning into his chair and watched Alfred recount the three paper bills as if it was disbelief.

Alfred jumped off the mahogany desk and walked towards Arthur. His movements were somewhat graceful yet had that twist of something evil and sexual. Arthur took a gulp from his dry mouth. "W-What?" was all he managed to say as Alfred leaned in, inches from his face.

"I have three provisos. I don't bottom, unless you're willing to pay waaaaaaay extra. I don't do any S or M stuff so tough luck. And I don't kiss on the lips."

Arthur looked up at him his mouth slightly ajar and managed to let out a whisper. "I don't kiss on the lips either."

Alfred kneeled in front of Arthur pulling off his tie and unbuttoning his expensive shirt pulling it out of the trousers Arthur wore. He looked up at Arthur's blushed face and knew what he was thinking; "_What am I doing here with him_?". He grinned and licked his bare chest and all the way up to his neck feeling Arthur getting goose-bumps. Alfred thought of him the same as any other man, he thought Arthur was disgusting but somehow when he meets Arthur's sea-green eyes that thought slipped away and only showed the gentleman he is. A man who probably wanted to get away from money and politics and relationships; Arthur was that good man.

Arthur only ever thought of schedules and never living the moment. He thought everything had its consequence good or bad. The moment he brought Alfred into his life he thought everything would go wrong, but somehow feeling the robotic touch made him feel calm. He would see nothing really wrong with Alfred. Alfred was just a man who was wearing clothes that he bought with the money he made. He was just human. Arthur was just a human. Yet why were they so different? Why did clothes and money separate two individuals and make them seem world apart. But this moment, it changed because the thought of money and reputation sank as Alfred touched his white chalky body.


End file.
